Chequers, scene of the crime incident.
We hiked around Chequers today, which is the prime minister's country residence, the equivalent of Camp David, for my American-based readers. Except it's not nearly so well guarded; there's basically a sign saying "Private, No Admittance", and some really large cameras that will shoot any intruder.
Anyway, in the wood next to the estate, my dog was involved in an incident, as we are calling it. I've talked to those who witnessed it, and they all say that basically the squirrel just ran into her mouth. There was no chasing involved. They are quite certain of this. And when I told her to drop it, she did so immediately, gently on to the ground, obviously quite concerned about the welfare of this poor misguided rodent that jumped into her mouth.
She actually seemed rather bemused by the whole thing. All these years chasing the damn things, and there's one just here for the taking?! What gives?
I'm sure if the incident was caught on camera my version of events will be backed up. After hiking a mile or more uphill (the highest point in the Chilterns, no less!), my dog was in no condition to actually assault a swift-footed squirrel, even one that was clearly leading her on. (Someone thought they heard a little squirrel voice squealing "come and get me, bitch!")
So then someone's cellphone rang. "It's Tony Blair; he wants his squirrel back."
(Sorry; rambler humor.)
It was suggested that the squirrel could have had bird flu, which was discovered in a cat in Germany. Maybe. But so far no bird flu has been detected in Britain, and the squirrel didn't look as if it had been vacationing on the continent.
If bird flu has arrived, Tony Blair will be the first to know. Anyone got a number for him? Maybe I'll ring him up; explain how the whole thing happened, get the latest on the bird flu situation. And tell him he might want to keep an eye on those squirrels in his wood; they are acting a bit strange.
